Expectations

It all comes from having unrealistic expectations.  I took Little Dude and Pnut to the zoo today.  I woke up this morning with an image, in my head, of how the trip would go.  What actually took place was much different.
Expectation-Comfortable, sunny day
Reality-FREEZING-The sun is out and there is not a cloud in the sky, but it is cold.
Expectation-The kids would run around, have fun and get tired out.
Reality-I carried LD around most of the time.  I'm exhausted.
Expectation-We would walk around and look at animals then stop for a snack.

Reality-They started crying for a snack before we got out of the parking lot.  I'm not sure we saw   more than one animal the whole time we were there.

Expectation-I would have a nice day with my 2 wonderful children.
Reality-I was upset things weren't going as planned and I had a temper tantrum.  Not a real one.  I was just bitchy.  Why do I care if they want to stop and have a snack as soon as we get to the zoo?  Not only am I upset that the zoo didn't go as planned, I'm upset at how I acted and how I'm beating myself up over it.

Reality-Things don't go as planned.  I'm not a perfect mom (or wife, or daughter). I'm going to say and do things I regret.  I will make plenty of mistakes.

I need to be ok with reality and keep my expectations in check.

Here are a couple pictures from our trip.  Brian gave me a hard time for taking the one of Little Dude crying.  Looking back, I feel bad about it.  But this was the 15th meltdown in the 2 hours we were there.  Am I horrible for taking it?

My poor little dude

Roaring like the lion

Happy Pnut

I promised them a ride on the carousel.

LD about to fall asleep

After a drive home, filled with tears, because I declined the request to have chocolate chips rolled up in a tortilla for lunch, they are in their rooms.  LD is asleep.  Pnut is coloring asking if rest time is over.  I am having lunch trying to figure out how to get out of my funk.

I need to put the morning behind me.  I have a 40 minute tempo run on my schedule today.  It is the LAST thing I want to do.  I'm thinking maybe snuggling with the kids on the sofa, watching Finding Nemo, and eating chocolate chip filled tortillas sounds like a better plan.