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Saturday, January 12, 2013

The Guilt of No Excuses

Today started out as a typical day.  My alarm went off at 5am.  I went downstairs, poured a cup of coffee, inhaled it, walked the dog, choked down a smoothie, and got on my bike.  Things were good for the first 45 minutes.  Then Brian came in (clearly upset) and said the kids were awake and crying and he had broken a vase.  I climb off my bike to assess the damage.  Little Dude was in tears.  From what I gather he was upset he couldn't find me.  I cleaned up the broken glass and started to make breakfast (chocolate chip pancakes and bacon).  By this time Brian is upstairs vacuuming up the glass I couldn't pick up.  I hear him yell.  Apparently he vacuumed up one of my necklaces.  My fancy, I can't believe I got this, necklace.  So I dug through the vacuum bag and got the necklace. Thankfully it was not broken.  I finished making breakfast, turned on Doc McStuffins and climbed back on my bike.

I felt guilty.  Brian was pissed off.  The kids woke him up on the morning he was planning on sleeping in.  I had tried to wake up early enough to get my training in before everyone woke up.  This didn't work out.  Part of me wanted to just wanted to forget about the rest of the ride.  At least I got 45 minutes in.  But another part of me said "Screw that!!".  If I am going to take this race seriously and give it my all, I'm going to have to ignore the excuses.  I'm going to have to be selfish sometimes.  

In the end I was able to do the entire 80 minutes. I'm so proud of myself for not giving into the guilt.  I got my ride in and my family survived.  I do, unfortunately, think I'm going to have to start waking up even earlier.  I'm going to do what I need to do in order to train and keep my family from falling apart.
This will not be me!




7 comments:

  1. I am new to your blog, but I personally think you did everything right, you got up before you expected your family to be up, trying to get your training done before they woke, even though it didnt go as planned, you still did everything you could to not interfer with family time, I would have done the same thing.

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    1. Thanks. Looking back, I know it was the right thing. At the time it didn't feel like it. I'm still early into my training. I think it's going to take a little while to figure out what works.

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  2. You did a great job getting back on the bike despite the craziness that ensued!
    You got this - it will all fall into place :)

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  3. Thanks for stopping my blog and commenting on Mountaineer Tri - it's a really small race so it's cool to meet someone else who knows how grueling that bike course is.

    Good job finishing that workout -- I give so much credit to triathlete moms. I'm single (no kids) and I couldn't imagine balancing a family in with everything else.

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  4. Dude. I soooo know those days. Good job sticking to it!

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  5. Shoot, I didn't know you had a blog! I updated my post to link to you, and now I'm so excited I have a new blog to read :D (Plus I can stalk your training now too!)

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  6. It's so hard to put ourself first sometimes, isn't it? You will only be the best mom you can be if you DO put yourself first sometimes. Way to go!

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