Be Proud

I have a bad habit of focusing on what I don't do, not focusing on what I do.  Instead of being happy with all the items crossed off my to-do list, I only see what didn't get done.   Instead of focusing on all the great things I do with/for the kids, I obsess over the times I yelled, or was short, or wasn't understanding.  

I do the same thing with my training.  I had a horrible bike ride last Saturday.  I literally stopped on the side of the trail and cried.  Cried and sent friends text messages about how sucky it was.  Thankfully my friend Kim, who happens to be training for a 70.3 as well, called and gave me a kick in the ass.  And Erika sent me a text that I'd be ok, I just needed to keep going.  I wiped my tears and finished the 56 mile ride.  I was angry when I got back to my car.  Instead of focusing on the fact that I just rode 56 miles, I focused on the fact that it was slower and harder than I thought it should have been.  I was thinking about all the people who are faster than I am, all the people who can ride farther (without crying).  At a time when I should have been proud of myself for sticking it out and finishing my ride, all I saw was the bad.  I had to ride past my car twice on this ride.  I could have stopped.  Given up. But I didn't.  I finished, even though it sucked.  That's something to be proud of.

I'm going to start being proud of my accomplishments.  I need to stop comparing myself to others, and stop looking at what I haven't done.  I'm going to focus on the good.  Focus on how far I've come.